STORYTIME: Illegal Dumping


Once upon a time, when I was working on a concrete foundation crew, we pulled down a remote dirt road to a job site. There were a couple fully loaded semis, a big P&H crane and a couple pickup trucks. As we navigated down to the end of the two track, we noticed a large group of turkey vultures hanging out in the middle of the road. We crept along and eventually scared the critters into the woods.

Once we parked everything at the job site, we looked around and, as was always a priority for us, we looked around for the portable toilets. We didn’t see any. Turns out Charlie was having a bit of an emergency and took off at a good clip into the woods with a half roll of TP to take care of his business. The rest of the crew had gathered at the end of the road to assess the site and figure out where to place all the equipment for the day’s work.

After a few minutes I looked up and saw 10-12 of the critters circling over the trees where Charlie was, erm, illegally dumping. All the guys began to yell at once, “Charlie! You better get outta there, man! The buzzards are comin’ for ya!” Right then the birds swooped below the tree line and here comes Charlie running out of the woods scared to death with his pants around his ankles still holding the half roll of TP.

One of the better days I had in the construction business.